Have you dipped your toes into intuitive eating only to decide it’s not working for you? Or maybe you love everything about the philosophy and have been working on it for awhile but you’re feeling stuck? Here are 3 common struggles to intuitive eating you might be experiencing.
The thing about learning to eat intuitively is it’s not all smooth sailing. While it eventually becomes more and more intuitive as you practice it, in the beginning it may feel anything but intuitive. If you think about it, it’s the opposite of what we’re used to with diets. And it goes against everything we’ve been conditioned to believe about eating.
For one, diets are a clearly defined set of rules that let you know you’re either doing it right or you’re doing it wrong. And regardless if you’re following a diet, it’s widespread belief that certain foods and certain ways of eating are more superior than others. And two, the beginning of a diet or a new wellness lifestyle starts off pretty easily and thoughts of desired outcomes feel exciting. But as we know as time goes on the inevitable happens and you’re knocked off the wagon. So, considering how common it is to be stuck in diet mentality and how long you’ve been living with a diet mindset, intuitive eating might start out pretty rocky. And when you’re so used to following diet culture’s rules that dictate your eating, it’s very normal to feel overwhelmed, confused and even anxious or scared. And that’s okay!! Don’t give up!
Intuitive Eating Has a Lot of Ups and Downs
As cliché as it sounds, intuitive eating is not a destination; It’s a journey. And there’s no final outcome because it’s an ongoing daily practice and a skill you develop over time. And just like with any practice, progress is never linear. This is especially true for intuitive eating because we’ve all grown up in a culture that has an incredibly disordered relationship with food and bodies. We’ve been forced into this culture and we’re forced to live in it every day, whether we like it or not. And regardless of how and to what degree diet culture has shaped your beliefs and mindset around food and your body, obstacles are bound to show up.
And it’s these obstacles, bumps and curves in the road that you can use as learning experiences to keep you moving forward and growing in your practice. But sometimes those obstacles feel more like being stuck in a muddy ditch that you can’t get out of. Here are just a few common struggles that people run into, and some tips, on how to overcome them.
Intuitive Eating Not Working? 3 Common Struggles
1. Turning intuitive eating into a diet
Diet culture has co-opted intuitive eating and it’s becoming more and more common to see diet messaging with the language of intuitive eating. And it’s talked about in a way that sounds so simple and so straightforward that it becomes confusing as hell. “Just eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full.” Or “just listen to your body.” The things is if you apply diet mentality to intuitive eating and place judgement on food choices and eating patterns, you’re ultimately creating new rules. i.e. “I’m being good when I only eat when I’m hungry and always stop when full.” Or “I feel bad because I ate a piece of cake when I wasn’t hungry.” And anytime there are rules that can be broken, there’s an all or nothing, black and white mentality that results in guilt and shame.
What to do?
- Remember honoring hunger and feeling your fullness are only a part of the intuitive eating process. There are 9 other principles! If you haven’t already, pick up a copy of the Intuitive Eating book.
- Remind yourself there is no failing at intuitive eating because there is no defined set of standards that make intuitive eating pass/fail. Which means there’s no final outcome that classifies a successful intuitive eater. There is only learning.
- Start to bring awareness to thoughts and beliefs around your eating and your hunger and fullness. Is there any judgement going on? If yes, just notice it and call it what it is…diet mentality.
- Permission. Allow yourself permission to eat when you’re not hungry and eat past fullness.
- Show yourself some kindness and compassion. It’s easy to apply a black and white mindset to intuitive eating when it’s all you’ve know for so long.
2. Lingering food rules and restrictive mentality
Are you unconditionally allowing yourself to eat and to eat all foods? Making peace with food and allowing all foods into your eating world is a key part of the process. Which may be very scary for a lot of reasons. But when you place judgement and conditions around food, your brain and your body will know you haven’t really bought into it. This will cause a backfiring of trust and keep you stuck. It’s crucial to rid yourself of judgement around food and eating, no matter what food it is or what the eating experience was like.
What to do?
- Think about the foods you assign a “bad” label to. Do you: tell yourself you can’t keep them in the house? If you eat them, do you feel guilty? Or if you allow yourself to eat those foods, are there conditions like limiting yourself to a certain portion or only allowing yourself if you had a “good” day of eating?
- Legalize your food choices and allow yourself to eat them while observing and being curious of any inner food thoughts and beliefs. Are there any lingering food rules or food policing thoughts that come up? Can you challenge those thoughts and reframe them with reasonable non-judgmental ones? Instead of “bad,” “good,” “should” and “shouldn’t” use words like “it’s okay,” “I noticed,” “I know” and “I can.”
- Be cautious of how social media has influenced your intuitive eating journey. It may be beneficial to do a social media cleanse to reduce exposure to diet language and messaging. Unfollow certain accounts that trigger diet thoughts.
3. You’re trying to do it ‘right’ or ‘perfectly’
A lot of people find comfort in believing there’s a right way and a wrong to do something, including how to eat. It’s feels “safer” when there’s rules that tell you exactly what to do in order to achieve an outcome. But the truth of the matter is there’s no right way to do intuitive eating. There’s no specific map to follow and no one’s policing your actions. Intuitive eating is a framework to help you develop skills to reconnect and build trust with your body. And it’s a personal process.
What to do?
- Let go of what you believe intuitive eating is supposed to look like or any expectations of where you should be in the process. There is no such thing as a perfect intuitive eater. Even those who have been practicing intuitive eating for years are not perfect at it. It’s about feeling at peace with food and finding joy in eating while nourishing your body without sacrificing your overall well-being. And it’s about working on a relationship between you, food and your body. And as they say, relationships aren’t perfect, but rather works in progress.
- Reframe perfectionist goals into more reasonable intentions. For example, instead of “I will always be present and eat mindfully,” replace it with “I will practice mindful eating regularly and will try to remain present on most days.
- Trust the process. Remember it takes time and learning experiences to cultivate a relationship where you have complete trust in your body and for your body to trust that it will be fed adequately.
You Deserve Food Freedom
This is by no means an all-inclusive list of struggles and why intuitive eating might not be “working” for you. There may be a number of fears holding your back or maybe you haven’t fully bought into the process. Just remember it’s common to get stuck along the way. And it takes time and practice to cultivate a healthy and trusting relationship between you, food and your body. If you’ve encountered challenges, keep going. You deserve food freedom. The bumps and roadblocks are a part of the journey, especially in the beginning. But down the road the bumps eventually smooth out into a much clearer path as you gain confidence in your practice and find more attunement with your body. What challenges have you encountered? Is there anything holding you back?
And remember if you feel intuitive eating isn’t working for you, you can always reach out to a professional for help. Book a FREE discovery call and we can chat about what it’s like to have support on your health journey.
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